Happy Father’s day to all the wonderful Dads out there.
I pretty much dislike this day. I sent my father-in law a card this week but I cannot ‘celebrate’ it. My father loved this day but I dreaded the expectations he had of me to treat him like a King. Every Fathers’ Day became a worry. If I ever forgot (which has happened) the repercussions were awful. I’d be reprimanded for the rest of the week and verbally scolded for my lack of love and appreciation for my hard-working, caring father.
A card wasn’t enough of a gesture either. If I only handed over a card, he would stand, waiting for the gift. Realising I was about to land in a lot of trouble, I would quickly cover up with a lie and blurt out how his present was “on its way”. It would be enough to stop his anger, at least for a few days. The present had to be grand to show how much I respected him. If it were up to me, I would have bought him a glass heart, smashed into a million pieces, wrapped in mud. Obviously, his gifts were less thought out than that and wine became the stand out present to give him.
Why was Fathers’ Day so important to him? He must have known each year that my hate for him was growing stronger. He in turn, despised me. I only ever upset him and irritated him yet he expected this unrealistic, exaggerated display of love. He wanted to be seen as the doting father who sacrificed everything to support his daughter when that couldn’t be further from the truth. He liked to boast to his peers about how well he was treated and the gifts he received and if I did not meet this I would be cast as a lousy and disrespectful child. I would be compared to other children who adored their fathers.
I did adore him once.
So Happy Fathers’ Day to all the truly loving fathers out there. I know you exist and your children are so lucky to have you.